Bakery...and blog!

so you know those times that you have these thoughts in your head.
like.
hey my dream is to work in a bakery as a baker.
and you know how those dreams don't pan out sometimes?
like.
you hardly work there.
and you keep thinking that they will keep their promises of training you.

well.
that happened.

i quit last week.

i'm a lot less stressed out and i had an amazing weekend!

I know I know it's Wednesday!

But I do this thing...where I start posts and never finish them.

So that's that.

Ooh I have to say, I'm proud of tanner and I. 

We've worked out every day so far this week.

It's hard to get back into a routine when you've been out of it for so long.

I feel out of shape for sure.

You know what I love though? 

Having tanner as my coach.

We kinda coach each other and it's fun.

I love how honest i can be with him and not be judged.

Like.

I want to be strong.

And I also want to be little.

In my head I was putting a weight to what I want to look like.

I tell my clients all the time not to rely on what number the scale says... 

And there I was doing the same thing!

So we decided to track body fat percentage, take pictures and track the weights that I'm lifting.

He's so smart I tell ya. ;)

I feel like health and fitness is a never ending journey.

Which I love because it is totally mental. 

I picked up a book from the library that I started reading today.

It's about mindful yoga and meditation.

One of my goals is to learn more about yoga, and eventually be certified.

So I'll keep you up on that little journey too...

Ooh I also wanted to try a new space for my blog, it's on wordpress.

I'm just messing around with it at the moment. 

I did my first post today and I already have 3 followers...

Here is the link...

https://sprinklesandshimmer.wordpress.com

So bear with me while I get it figured out. I like the platform better so far.

And I feel like it's a better place for me to make it more of a professional thing. 

I PROMISE I will post on there everyday. :)

xo

morgan.

newness.

i know i posted something yesterday.
but hey i missed typing already.

so as some of you may know, tanner and i are using our town home as our first rental property.

we are still moving out of it and into our new apartment.

there is something about having two people that love each other in a small space.
we've been at the apartment for a week and i already feel like our love has grown stronger.
i see this quote all the time on pinterest... and its so so true.

"love grows best in little houses with fewer walls to separate. where you eat and sleep so close together you can't help but communicate. if we had more room think of all we'd miss. love grows best in little houses just like this."

tanner and i have been married for 4 years next month.

i feel like we are more in love than ever.
we wake up with gratitude.

to be so close.
to be so in love.
to be so happy.

tanner and i have been through a lot the past 5 years that we've been together.
big decisions.
buying a house.
owning a gym.
moving out of the house.
still owning the gym.
fights.
not communicating effectively.

we are finally understanding what each of us needs to feel loved.

to be honest.
i love all of the clients that he trained.
but he was giving all of his love to you guys.
which is what i love about him.

but he was so exhausted from giving everyone else his love... there wasn't any left for me.
he did what he thought was best.
worked his ass off and provided for us financially.

one thing women i feel like don't talk about is the emotional part of a relationship that they need.
i need to be needed.

there is this one look that tanner gives me now.
its like i'm the only person in the whole entire world.
its completely exhilarating.
that look makes me feel loved.
even the way we kiss is different... better.

last night it was like we were just married, i was so super excited for him to come home from work.
you could even say i was nervous.
i had butterflies.

isn't this the love and romance i have always dreamed of?
absolutely.
i am the happiest i've ever been. ever.

also.
honesty.
be true to yourself.

i never let anyone "in"
i love people yes.
but i never got too close.

thats what tanner needs.
me to let him in.
i've never loved anyone fully.
always one foot on the ground.

with him, i can finally jump in with both feet.
i'm not scared anymore.
we are in it forever.

i can be true.
i can be authentic.
i can be crazy.
i can be wild.
i can be sweet.
i can be anything i want with him.
ah.

how i got lost...
i'm not sure.
i'm just so lucky that tanner saved me.
i can fall apart in his arms and know that he will put me back together no matter how long it takes.

i'd do the same for him.
i'll be there in his darkest nights.
i'll run away with him.
i'll always find him if he ever hides.
i'll rescue him ten million times if it means that he will always be mine.

life couldn't be more perfect.

xo.
morgan.

happiness.

soo.
yes i've been MIA for a minute.
i've been evaluating my life.
what do i need to make me happy??

well i'm absolutely certain of two things.
being a wife.
being a mother.

but what else?

being financially stable i guess?
i mean really.
have you ever thought about what you need in your life to make you happy?

i know a lot of it for me...

well wait.
lets stop for a second.




i'm going to be honest here.
like real honest.
so if you want to know... keep reading.
if not... stop now.
you may look at me in a different light.
which is ok.
i am being authentic and true to who i really am.

tanner challenged me to figure out what i wanted my life to look like.

so i did.

of course if you sit down and think about it, all the material things come to mind first.

pretty house.
pretty hair.
pretty clothes.
pretty cars.

so i thought. and thought. and thought.

still i want all of those things.
but what about my day?
what do i want that to look like?
i challenge my clients to do this sometimes.

so what does it look like?

well i LOVE mornings.
i wake up before tanner. everyday.
so i imagine getting up and making breakfast and prepping the families food for the day.
i imagine getting everyones clothes all put together and ready.
then i make tea and wake tanner up with ten million kisses.
we go sit on our porch and talk.
about anything because we aren't in a hurry.

when tanner goes to work,
thats when i get my workout in.
yoga & lifting.

when our kids are little i imagine taking them to the park and discovering new things everyday.
teaching them.
loving them.
creating memories.
soaking in every moment of their littleness. :)

i'll run errands.

then. i'll come home.
sit in my office and work on my blog.
and put together a list of events that i am coordinating for people.
(this is a new thing that i'm into.)
i want to plan events.
baby showers, birthdays, weddings, bridal showers.
anything.
as long as they get to be pretty. ;)

then my cute husband will come home.
i'll greet him with ten million kisses.
(so will the kids, when we have them.)

we will make dinner together while we drink.
just a couple of drinks of course.

then we sit.
and eat dinner and catch up on the day.

maybe after we watch a movie or go on a walk.

then. after the kids are put to sleep...
we will meditate.
and have time alone.
mostly just staring into each others eyes because let me tell you i can totally get lost in tanners.


and basically thats it.
thats my day.
tanner said to me
"i feel like you want to live a princess life."

but thats the thing.
i love taking care of people.
especially the ones that i love.
so why not have it all?

i know this is super mushy and lovey but its ok.

sometimes you just need that.

basically...
i am in love with love.
and pretty little things.

we make life hard.

take a step back and think about what you really want.

dream again.

xo.
morgan.

ahhh inspiration.

hi guys!
i hope you all had an AMAZING holiday.

tanner and i were talking about our lives since we've been together.
he reminded me of something that i totally forgot about.
we would get ready to go on a date or even just go see his family..
i would stand in front of the mirror and bawl my eyes out and say how much i hated the way i looked.
nothing he said could "fix" me.
he said it always made him so sad.

i want to know.
how many of you do that?
seriously beat yourself up every day?
i did that. a lot.

i truly believe now that positive self talk is real.
it changes you.
stand in the mirror and look at your strengths.
not your weaknesses.
granted we can always improve.
but crawl in and live there.

so what changed?
i mean i still have plenty of days where my hair just isn't right or you seriously feel fat.
its a real thing.
honestly...
i started taking time for myself.
doing things that just I wanted to do.
i always had a hard time being alone.
now... its one of my favorite places to be.

i love walking outside.
its my favorite.
i love writing poetry.
i love reading.
i love pinterest ha.

i've talked to a lot of people this week about finding healthy things that also are stress relievers.
i don't think we realize how much stress plays a role in every single thing that we do.
we are too busy running to the next thing.

take some time this weekend to discover what you really enjoy.
and schedule some time for yourself everyday.
i know its easier said than done but it really will free up your mind in so many ways.

i have this client..
she is my new best friend.
seriously.
she inspires me so much.
so much so that i am firmly recommitted to my fitness goals.
i love that she sent me a picture of her doing cardio from MY gym at 6:30 this morning.
she's seriously amazing. :)
the best part is she is hilarious!
she will be famous one day.
i can hardly wait.
she already shines...
i just can't even imagine when she has all the self confidence in the world.
she will blow us all away.

i love being a health and wellness coach.
i haven't talked a bunch about herbalife lately.
mostly because i've been trying to figure out where i want to go with it.

here is the truth.
i want clients that are ready and willing to change.
not just their food...
their entire lives.
thats what being healthy is.
it really is a life change.
it isn't easy.

but i will stand right by your side if you let me.

xo.
morgan.

whoa...

sooo.
if you knew me a little over a year ago you'd say. morgan... you hate change. what are you doing?!

i've gone part time with the job that i have with my dad. which has been really bittersweet. i cried like a big baby last friday which was my last day with one of my kids.

i've started helping this cute little bakery out called CAkE its soooo freaking cute. and the cupcakes are amazing. the owners are just super sweet. go check them out. please. :)

i'm finally helping tanner at our gym. sheesh! its been long enough right??
i feel like there aren't enough hours in the day for everything that i want to do.
so i went to the mall today and handed out business cards. yes that was fun!
except... when you don't have money you seriously do find everything you could ever want in your wardrobe. so really i just left feeling kinda sad.
i mean i found the most PERFECT sports bra. that is serious!! haha.

you know i want to be a WBFF pro one day...
well reality check...
i don't want to do lingerie shoots.
i feel like fitness competitors need to be strictly fitness.
but whatever. i'll just work towards my goal. :)
which makes me super excited. i've been walking everyday and i already feel leaner.
AMAZING.

lets see...
oh i decided to put my esthetics license to use!!!
i'm going to start doing facials out of the gym.
woo hoo. that makes me soooo happy.

oh and... i am going to go to school to get certified as a yoga instructor.

so i will be one zen girl with my yoga && facials.

:)

i've decided all of this in less than a week.
sheesh.
you know what is cool though?
typically my anxiety would be THROUGH THE ROOF!
but its not.
is that a sign that i'm finally falling into place where i need to?
maybe.

i'm just so happy and i love it.
i had to share it with all of you.
make your dreams come true!!!
whats stopping you?!?

i feel like this post was ALL over the place...
just gives you a glimpse into my mind.  :)

xo.
morgan.

it's ALWAYS a journey.

so.

i'm a health and wellness coach.

we KNOW this.

i LOVE what i do.

what i love most i think is learning about our relationship with food and what it means.

i've yet to learn how to fix it.

when i have a stressful day, i always want to go on a date with tanner.

when i have a fantastic day, i want to go out with tanner.

some days... most days i don't feel like following my meal plan.

my anxiety comes back.

i eat whatever i want and don't care about my goals.

i give up my long term happiness for short term gratification.

tanner and i were talking about how we could maybe find the real problems.

the real problem..

i worry TOO dang much.

about everything.

tanner was telling me i was too obsessed with my macros and led me to this book...

basically i KNOW how to eat healthy. 

i KNOW what foods make me feel good.

so the author of this book said hey,

take a picture of what you eat and then write on a post it note how it made you feel. 

i'm over thinking of food in calories. 

i want food. 

oh and go to the farmers market! i love that idea.

so thats a new goal.

one thing i'm not on the same page with is the multivitamins.

you NEED vitamins.

no one has the time in their day to get all of their needed nutrients from just whole food. 

its impossible.

so ya.

i'm still on this whole eating food thing.

its HARD.

i want to find a way that we can make good healthy choices without even having to think about it. 

one day i guess.

its just too damn difficult to figure out if you are getting too much or not enough of something.

when i find a way i will absolutely share it. 

for now. 

stick to lean protein && fresh produce.

lots and lots of water.

and of course your multivitamins.

people think herbalife is just shakes...

nope.

it matters what you eat around your shakes.

choose foods that make you feel light and awake.

take time to eat it and enjoy it!

really feel how it makes you feel.

xo.

morgan.

book.

http://www.stumptuous.com/fuck-calories

ooh the places you will go...

So

I'm sitting here in my bed reflecting on the last month and thinking about things that I didn't... Wouldn't do. 

It all caught up to me. 

I am in the process of learning. 

 

I'm not beating myself up over it. 

I'm saying alright awesome... What worked? What didn't work?

What will I do to make this month even MORE amazing???

It's so crazy, the process of designing your own life. You'd think it would be easy... Well it's work. It's learning. 

Don't get me wrong I LOVE learning. 

But

Here's the thing. 

I started losing love for myself again.

...

That is the most valuable thing that I teach! 

I stopped fueling my body with everything that it truly needed, I completely put my workouts on hold... I even stopped taking time for me in the morning to wake up slow and at my own pace.

Why??

I'm not sure. I could give you a million and a half excuses, but those won't get me anywhere.

The best part is, I know what didn't work.

Tomorrow begins a new day... 

I will work on me again. 

I am making myself valuable.

So I can go to work for all of you guys.

I'm so excited for my clients this month.

I will be 100% honest here...

I lost some of you along the way.

I didn't take a stand for you.

You will be hearing from me. 💕

Like I said, I've learned so much.

It's not just about my herbalife business though...

I'm figuring out what I truly want my life to look like day in and day out.

I love helping people reach their goals && grow into the people they are meant to be. I'm also the happiest around my husband and well let's be honest, my cats hahaha.

But it just makes sense for me to spend more time where I am happy. :)

Some of you know that I am going part time with my current job because we had conflicting schedules with the kids. I am struggling with that... It's sooo hard leaving this boy that I have seen just about 5 days a week, every week out of the past year. I would do anything for this boy and his family. His mom is just incredible... I know she is reading this. ;) but seriously she has taught me so much and I feel like we built an awesome relationship over the past year too. I'm lucky enough to say that I can still go visit :) phew. Anyway... Now that I'm crying where was I? 

Oh ya, going part time.

I will be at our gym a lot more...

I used to call it tanners gym. But really it is our business. Oh! And he is going to be my trainer... Finally he is going to make time for me. ;)

I'm excited. There are a lot of changes happening and I'm terrified also, but it's a good thing.

I've been talking to tanner, and really all we care about is helping people lose weight and live long happy healthy lives. I'm so happy that we opened a gym and herbalife came to us! It has given me this newfound love for health and fitness that I never knew I had. My ultimate goal is to be a WBFF pro and coach other women to do competitions. I want women to understand that they are strong and beautiful. :) eating protein and lifting heavy won't make you masculine.. I mean obviously there are those that take it overboard. But I just want every woman to find their true value... I think for sooo long we have been told that we are weak. It's just not true. We hold families together. We are meant to inspire and empower each other to be the best versions of ourselves. :)

Now I know this post was kind of all over the place... But my head has been about ten million places lately and it always helps for me to write it out. Thank you for reading... I love comments. ;) let's get a discussion going! What empowers you? How do you find your value?

xo.

morgan.